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noimeWelcome to Noime.net – the world of a 20 something first time Mummy.

I hope that my life and thoughts amuse, interest, and generally entertain whenever you need an escape.

Why Noime, you ask? Merely a childhood nickname, one of a couple coined by my brother. I thought it was finally time to put it to good use. Better than one of the wholly unsavoury alternatives, I assure you. And why “sad little lunatic…”? Well, this website wouldn’t truly be mine without some classic British comedy thrown in. The line is from an episode of The Vicar of Dibley.

If you’d like to watch it, click on the first episode here: Arrival

Noime is

  1. A full time mummy. Baby Alexandra arrived on Friday the 13th of June, 2008.
  2. In love.
  3. A shopaholic.
  4. The daughter of two fabulous parents – Hi Mum & Dad!
  5. Blonde. Yes, really. Always have been. Except for the 18 months I spent as a teenager waiting for my PINKY/ORANGEY hair dye to grow out. Stupid supposedly red hair dye. Comes out in 6 washes my ass.
  6. Never going to get the vacuuming done with a baby sleeping in her lap.
  7. A big sister – Hi Munchy & Posie!
  8. Learning to cook new recipes.
  9. Reading Jeremy Clarkson’s Collection at the moment. Dawn French “Dear Fatty”; Michael Parkison “Parky - My Autobiography”
  10. Collecting nice wooden furniture.

Noime has

  1. The best man in the history of men… www.korschmin.com
  2. A degree – English Literature, French & Japanese – don’t knock The Arts people.
  3. A slight chocolate obsession.
  4. Quite an extensive DVD collection. Think of it as an alternative investment… or a visual nest egg.
  5. An ageing basset hound called Barkley and a ginger cat called Basil (as in Basil Fawlty).
  6. Almost completed a primary teaching degree. Completed a primary teaching degree!
  7. Too many clothes… but not enough for some reason. Why is that always the case?
  8. Spent way too much time playing computer games lately. Peggle has a lot to answer for.
  9. Lost her mind and got a facebook account.
  10. A LOT of books.

Noime loves

  1. Her baby girl.
  2. Her man www.korschmin.com for those of you who missed it.
  3. Jigsaws, crosswords & other puzzles.
  4. Classic English comedy… Vicar of Dibley, Blackadder, Young Ones, Fawlty Towers etc.
  5. Christmas time.
  6. Colin Firth. Mmm.
  7. Junk mail. The stuff in your letterbox NOT, I repeat NOT the stuff that comes via email.
  8. Watching Deal or No Deal and Sex and the City with her Mummy.
  9. Billy Joel’s music.
  10. Playing cards at Nanna & Grandpa’s.

Noime loathes

  1. Licorice.
  2. The hoons in my neighbourhood who wake up my baby AND threaten my cat’s life. How about you invest your money in something useful rather than your penis-extension cars? You do realise the more it costs and the faster you drive it, the less impressive it is? In particular, the driver of the ¼ of a million dollar Mercedes that keeps speeding along our street. You do realise we hate you.
  3. Parenting advice… I think we’re doing just fine, thanks.
  4. Jetstar Airways… Best service? What a load of nonsense. A threat to our lives more like.
  5. Ugg boots and short skirts – why girls, why?
  6. Big Brother. Come on you idiots… have you never read 1984?
  7. Poor literacy skills. If you EVER see an article with a spelling mistake, please let me know. Baby Brain sometimes takes its toll. With an English degree and an English teacher for a mother, I should, and do, know better.
  8. The amount of money spent on sport when classical music is dying… Come to think of it, the amount of time dedicated to sport on the news. It is not news, people, it’s a hobby, for which you do not deserve to be paid a cent, or have broadcasted during, or often before, important world issues.
  9. “Jobs for the boys”… the attitude that skill and talent are irrelevant if you have connections.
  10. Neighbours. (The T.V. show, not the people from whom you borrow things.) I believe a character has “toad” in their name. Why is this popular television? Ugh. My daughter will NOT be watching that crap.

Noime wishes

  1. She could buy her man the Bentley he’s always wanted. At least he wouldn’t drive it like a hoon.
  2. Paris was just a teensy weensy bit closer.
  3. She was an octopus… baby, washing, vacuum, remote control, laptop, food. No need to put anything down.
  4. She didn’t have a mini muffin top… damn the need for less food and more exercise. Well, any exercise really. Shopping sadly doesn’t count. Not unless I do a lot of it. Hmm. Food for thought.
  5. House prices were realistic.
  6. That Nanna would learn to email. She’d really like it.
  7. For sleep… hmm I think I remember what that was like…
  8. For a cancer cure.
  9. More people will visit www.korschmin.com :)
  10. For all children to be loved as much as her daughter.

Noime hopes

  1. She never has to put the baby into childcare and go back to work.
  2. To win lotto. You never know your luck…
  3. They make more Vicar of Dibley.
  4. To read her Shakespeare anthology cover to cover one day.
  5. To see Tony Bennett live in concert before it’s too late.
  6. To see Judi Dench live on stage… yes, there’s a live theme developing here.
  7. To have seven kiddies eventually…
  8. Her basset hound makes it to age 20.
  9. Her daughter will not grow up too quickly.
  10. People will enjoy her site!

Please feel free to share your thoughts too – the more the merrier!